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Happy Birthday to me!

Not the blog, me, the human. I probably shouldn’t disclose that, for the purpose of not being deeply doxxed. But, so it goes, I’ve decided, dear readers, that you’re not likely to, and that I’m a small enough fish that I’m going to be fine.

I’m going to pass this birthday quietly preparing for surgery. So I’m going to do a round up of work I’m proud of from this year. First, the links from this blog that I’m most proud of that I think are best-written:

1) A Brief History Of Polyamory: no one has read this one, because it's old and has no photo, but it's strong writing and good research and theory.

2) Kitchen Table and Parallel Polyamory: An Introduction: Because it manages to cram into a small amount of space a very complicated idea that takes 7 posts to lay out examples that still don't cover all the ground of the basic theory outlined, neatly, therein.

3)Your Family Doesn't Need to Accept Polyamory: Because I could have mic-dropped a sentence in and I think made good points with every word I added thereafter. (This is my self-congratulating post, roll your eyes, but I don't want a message about how I'm wrong unless it's to praise my genius in another post)

4)Your Partners Can Handle Emotions When They're Hard: Because I'm right even if being vulnerable is nigh-impossible some days.

Then, that I am proudest to have shared because they’re vulnerable:

1)Sometimes your Emotions Are Hard: Because I didn't really want to admit I'm shitty at grudges.

2)Gates and Guided Tours: Unfolding Secrets to New Partners: Because admitting that I give away sections one at a time when I might date some of you some day is really cramping my style... I mean, because admitting how my mind works is occasionally dark and occasionally uncomfortable, and no one reading this was sort of insult to injury.

3) Compersion is not mandatory: Could probably go in either of these two sections; because it's well crafted, and because there have been long sections of my life where I have felt "not poly enough" or mildly "broken" because I don't "feel enough compersion." Now that I've shown up long enough that they let me teach I'm working really hard to change that norm and I hope you'll join me.

4)The Green Eyed Monster In My Life: Spoilers, It's Me: Where I abuse my eye color to make Clue references about flames on the side of my face and the sheer number of times a year I follow the advice Marmee gave Jo in Little Women and just go away for a minute into a story, because as implied above, sometimes my emotions are hard, I'm not great at compersion, and sometimes that involves jealousy.

Now, a picture of some knitting I did (because I knit, rather a lot, under normal circumstances):

Last, I’ve written myself a pretty good in my opinion poem that my partner says is excellent - and he’s a published author in poetry, so I should probably trust him even though my instincts tell me I can’t write poetry. You, gentle reader, will be so kind to me as to read it, and you will, please, consider it and the work above, and drop a coin in the ko-fi hat if you enjoyed any of it, for my birthday.


There is fire in your eyes

Behind the honey there that I only see by candlelight

And there is fire in my hair

Even when I don’t add it from a box, it dances like magic

I am magic, it runs deep

Deep in my veins like women in swamps of old (and young)

And you are magic of fire

Flint at the edge of the ocean, rocks meeting the sea up north

Where I am southerly

And we meet in the middle, somehow, for a moment

A moment suspended

Suspended in magic we both built in fire and water

My marshy swamps

And your downeast coastlines laying thick with flints

And with driftwood

Protected beneath cavelines that mirror my willows

Branches as black

As flints, and fires as bright as magical fires that meet

In the middle, in

Honey that can only be seen by candlelight and kisses.


No standard link soup at the end but you know where to go, or that link above, or look up Planned Parenthood and how to donate. Community health is important.

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